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The Coaching Habit book club questions
Here are 11 book club questions for The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier, ordered to open easily and end somewhere worth arguing about. Copy them, print them, or bring them up one at a time.
The Coaching Habit is Michael Bungay Stanier's practical guide to asking better questions — specifically, seven questions that he argues should become habitual for any manager who wants to coach rather than just direct.
Michael Bungay Stanier · 2016 · 3h 15m
Full summary and key takeaways →The 11 questions
- 1.
Stanier describes the advice trap — the pattern of giving advice faster than you should. Where in your work does this pattern show up most reliably?
- 2.
What question do you most rely on when starting a difficult conversation? How does it shape where the conversation goes?
- 3.
Try 'And what else?' three times consecutively in your next significant conversation. What comes out in the third answer that wasn't in the first?
- 4.
Think about someone on your team who regularly brings you problems. Are they bringing you problems they could solve themselves? What would change if you asked 'What do you want?' before offering anything?
- 5.
Stanier says coaching is not a formal activity but a way of interacting. What percentage of your conversations with direct reports involve you asking questions versus giving answers?
- 6.
The 'Lazy Question' — 'How can I help?' — requires the other person to specify their need. Why is that uncomfortable for both parties, and what does that discomfort reveal?
- 7.
What conversation have you been avoiding because you didn't know how to start it? Could one of the seven questions open it?
- 8.
Stanier's approach requires resisting the impulse to give advice. For you personally, what does that impulse feel like and what triggers it?
- 9.
How do you currently end your coaching or 1:1 conversations? What would change if you closed every one with 'What was most useful about this?'
- 10.
The book is deliberately short. Does the brevity help or hurt your confidence that the approach will work in the complexity of real management situations?
- 11.
What's the difference between asking 'What's the real challenge?' and asking 'What's the problem?' What does the word 'real' do?
How to run the discussion
- Pick six to eight, not all of them. An hour of real discussion covers fewer questions than anyone expects, and racing the list is what makes a book club feel like homework.
- Open with what people noticed, not what they concluded. Asking for a verdict first hardens opinions before anyone has heard each other.
- Let the disagreement run. The questions below that split a room are the ones worth the time; the ones everyone answers the same way can be skipped.
- Ask the quiet person a specific question. A direct, narrow question is far easier to answer than an open invitation to contribute.
Themes worth steering toward
If the conversation stalls, these are the threads that usually restart it.
Common questions
What are good book club questions for The Coaching Habit?
Here are 11 book club questions for The Coaching Habit by Michael Bungay Stanier, ordered to open easily and end somewhere worth arguing about. The strongest openers ask what each reader noticed rather than what they concluded, and the discussion usually turns on coaching, management, communication.
How long should a book club discussion of The Coaching Habit last?
Most groups run 60 to 90 minutes of actual discussion. That is roughly six to eight questions, not all of them, so pick the ones that suit your group rather than working down the list in order.
What are the main themes in The Coaching Habit?
Coaching, Management, Communication, Leadership, Questions. Those are the threads most likely to divide a room, which makes them the useful places to steer a discussion that has gone quiet.
Picking the next one? See books like The Coaching Habit or questions for other book club picks.
